


Questions

by moonlite



Category: Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: I was looking for something else and found this, Other, do what you want with it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-30
Updated: 2019-07-30
Packaged: 2020-07-27 13:01:06
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 564
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20046445
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/moonlite/pseuds/moonlite
Summary: No actual plot. Just some questions Crowley has asked in the past and the times to come and things he wants to say. You'll have to make your own plot for it if you want to. Happy reading!





	Questions

**Author's Note:**

> This was just labeled "GO3" in my files and I'm rubbish at giving titles. Hope you don't mind.

“Lord?”  
“YES?”  
“This new thing you’re making, it won’t be perfect, right?”  
“YES,”  
“But we have to take care of it,”  
“YES,”  
“Why?”  
“BECAUSE IT’S NOT PERFECT AND IT’LL MAKE MISTAKES,”  
“Yeah, so?”  
“SO YOU HAVE TO TAKE CARE OF IT SO IT DOESN'T HURT ITSELF,”  
“So you want us to babysit this… earth thing?”  
“YES,”  
“But, why?”  
“THINK OF THIS AS TAKING CARE OF YOUR YOUNGER BROTHER,”  
“But my younger brothers are angels and they are perfect,”  
“THINK OF THIS AS THE BLACK SHEEP OF THE FAMILY, THEN,”  
“Black sheep?”  
“GO AND MINGLE ABOUT. I’LL TELL YOU LATER,”

\- 

“Lord?”  
“YES?”  
“What’s a black sheep?”  
“OH, YOU’RE BACK AT IT,”  
“You told me you’d tell me later,”  
“YES. LATER,”  
“Now is later, Lord,”  
“I KNOW,”  
“So, what’s a black sheep?” 

-

“Lord?”  
“YES?”  
“This new thing you made,”  
“YES?”  
“You have my brothers assigned to guard it,”  
“YES,”  
“Why didn’t you assign me?”  
“BECAUSE I HAVE GREATER PLANS FOR YOU,”  
“Like what?”  
“YOU WILL KEEP THE BALANCE OF THE EARTH,”  
“So, like training wheels?”  
“YES,”  
“That actually sounds exciting,”

\- 

“Lord?”  
“Lord? Are you there?”  
“Whatever I did, I didn’t mean it,”  
“I’m sorry!”  
“Lord?”

\- 

“I only asked questions, you know?”  
“You could’ve just told me to stop,”  
“You’re petty and I hope your little earth fail.”

-

“I’m sorry I didn’t mean what I said,”  
“Lord, please, I’m begging here,”  
“Lord?”  
“Lord, are you still there?”

\- 

“This is silly. I’m a demon now. I don’t know why I keep doing this so this is going to be the last,”  
“Or at least the last for now.”  
“But, Lord?”  
“Out of everything I hate you for, thank you for Aziraphale.”  
“I mean I don’t really hate you but it feels like I do so I’m going with that,”  
“But thank you for him.”  
“That’s all,”

-

“Lord, I - I don’t really know what to say. I just - I want Aziraphale but he’s yours. I don’t want to own him of course but - “  
“This is ridiculous. I am a demon. You made everything. Surely you know what’s happening.”  
“Unless you’ve deserted us then, in that case, I will have Aziraphale and we will keep the world. We will not abandon it.”  
“We will run it the way we see fit,”  
“Also you can tell Metatron to bugger off.”

\- 

“Lord?”  
“I don’t really know if you’re listening but I am going to take care of the earth. Me and Aziraphale we - We will take care of it.”  
“Like dads, maybe? But humans are smart on their own so we will just guide it towards where it can go. I know you saw what happened. The world can be destroyed so…”  
“If you are out there, listening, or not, I will do whatever I can, me and Aziraphale, to protect this earth you made.”  
"You might have to pry it out of our hands but - you know how it goes. I don't really need to tell you."

-

“Lord?”  
“I just realized,”  
“I didn’t fall because I asked too many questions, did I?”  
“I fell because you wanted me to,”  
“You and your ineffable plan.”  
“You’re an asshole and you know it,”

-

“Lord?”  
“I’m keeping Aziraphale.”  
“I don’t know if he’ll want to be kept but I’m keeping him.”  
“Him and this Earth you made.”  
“I’ll keep them both safe.”  
“So you have the last laugh,”  
“But I’m happy on my own.”


End file.
